Frankie says Relax!

I said it in my last entry but it was buried. So at the risk of sounding shrill:

Dear visitors:
RELAX! Breathe! You are on vacation. Not only that, you are vacationing on an island. Getting two cars ahead isn't going to do much. There's no other place to go. We are surrounded by water.

Everyone wants to get to their beach/minigolf/bar/house as much as you do. Understand that. So please wait your turn. Gunning 5 cars ahead will save you, what, a minute? That's not much time and not worth raising your blood pressure.

Also, when you are at the beach with your wife and daughter, and the sun is warm and the wind is just right and you have your feet buried in the sand? Put away the Blackberry. Heck, don't even bring it to the beach. Nothing is so important it can't wait a few hours while you relax.

Talk to your wife. Find out how she is doing. You're likely always working and she might miss that connection. (Then again, maybe she doesn't and this is part of the arrangement! Who knows!)
Look at your daughter! She is gorgeous and sweet and smart. She won't be that size much longer, where she is still excited about playing with a toy dolphin in a bucket of salt water.

Your email can wait. Your daughter can not.

Driving in New Jersey

The one thing I don't think I'll ever get used to is driving in this state. Particularly on the Garden State Parkway. The posted speed limit is 65. Now, I am not some sort of puritan who insists at going at or below the speed limit. I'll admit it, I'll sometimes push 5 to 10 miles over.

I follow the "use the left lane for passing only" style of driving and sometimes when I am doing my 10 (ok 15) over in the left lane to pass someone in the right lane, I get nosed. Okay, that's fine. some people go faster than me. But when I am going OVER the speed limit in the right lane and people are nosing me, I get angry. First of all, go in the left lane and pass me if you think I'm going to slow. Second of all, seriously? You are nosing me to go faster when I am already going over the speed limit? As if your speed is the correct speed? It's just some of that selfishness and self-centeredness and entitlement...um, entitlementness (it's now a word) that I find lately.

Perhaps this is all magnified by the tourists here. I sort of want to wave out the window and yell "HEY! you're on vacation! It's okay to relax!" There is a light that has two lanes before the intersection and one lane after. It stands to reason that you would merge every other car--just makes sense, doesn't overly slow down either lane. But I always get these people who gun ahead to get in front of me, before their turn, as if they need to win. People. It's 35 mph. On an island. We're not going anywhere.

Another thing I struggle with is the lack of signage. This is a state built for GPS systems. Because sometimes the street sign for a major intersection either won't appear (frighteningly common) or will appear almost after the turn. This is especially frustrating with the New Jersey jughandles, where you turn right to take a left. I thought I had it all down, major intersections have jug handles, less major do not. But then there is an intersection in Brick where its a straight up left turn and I was in the right lane. I missed the turn, obviously, and had to drive a few blocks before I could find a place to turn around. Confusing.

All of this is probably compounded by the fact I drive a lot, so I get frustrated a lot.

I think I'll take my own advice and relax!

Arrest Me

I've never had more of a hard time following stoplights as I have here. I actually ran a red light the other day. To top things off, it was the light on Central Ave right by the Surf City police station. Good thing all of them weren't sitting outside or something.

Really, turning the lights back on was the worst idea ever. The lights are so high up that I don't notice them because, frankly, I was never looking for them in the first place. I got used to breezing down Central Avenue without a care in the world...except for the speed limit, of course, which has also gone down and I'm sure I often inadvertently break it.

Part of the problem is that I don't use streets with lights very often. Since I am bayside, I use Barnegat Avenue to get to the causeway, and Barnegat Ave has no lights until the causeway, which was a light that is on year-round. So the occasions I use Long Beach Blvd or Central Ave in Surf City, I am not observant enough to notice stoplights.

Interestingly, lights have not yet been turned on in Harvey Cedars and Barnegat Light. Maybe because their season starts way later than Memorial Day, since its mostly residential up there? That is my guess.

In any case, if there are any Surf City/Ship Bottom officers reading this, please go easy on me when I run a red light. Its not that I am some jerk in a hurry, or someone who enjoys putting others' lives at risk, it's just that I really, really, really haven't gotten used to those darn lights being back on.

BENNYs

EDIT: I wrote this post last week and for some reason it didn't post, so I edited a bit and updated it to make it pertinent after the Memorial Day weekend.

EDIT2: Ok, and by "for some reason" I mean user error. I hit "save draft" as opposed to "publish post."

One of the realities of living in a seasonal place is that eventually "the season" comes around. For Long Beach Island, that season is, obviously, summer.
This past weekend was Memorial Day, which is the traditional kick-off to all things summer and the start of the tourist/seasonal visitor parade to the island. One of the most noticeable changes is traffic.

During the winter months, I got used to careening around willy-nilly, with few cars or traffic lights to bother me. Let me tell you, this island was EMP-TY. Especially January through March-ish, when there are few holiday weekends to bring people to the island until Easter. (There were still regular visits for Thanksgiving, Christmas, New Years, etc.)

I noticed the traffic start to thicken around April, I'm guessing people started coming out with the Easter weekend. I actually escaped the island this weekend while people poured in, heading to North Carolina to visit my cousin and his adorable twins.

Oh, and the title of this post is a name, somewhat derogatory I think, for what "locals" call summer people. The Wikipedia entry talks about the different possible etymology of the word, but either way its not very nice. I can somewhat sympathize with locals, because it does feel crowded, plus I hear there are some people who spoil the batch of apples by acting boorish and generally like their actions have no effect, but visitors to this tourist area definitely pump economic dollars, as well as tax dollars to the area. There wouldn't be as good of infrastructure if officials weren't constantly preparing for summer.

Nevertheless, I hope everyone pays attention to the second sign and DRIVE SAFELY. I really don't feel like being nosed on my way home from work, simply because you sat in the parking lot called the Parkway for 5 hours.

(PS Someone who is a "local" said I was a "local" now because if you are willing to spend winter on the island, that makes you a local. I dunno about that...what do you think?)

Taking responsibility

I'm sort of obsessed with the road. It makes sense, since I drive usually a minimum of 200 miles per week. Not as obsessed, perhaps, as Roadguy or Froggie but I do read those blogs because of my interest in the byways and highways. I mean, in some of my profiles, it lists my biggest pet peeve as people who don't signal their turns or lane changes. In the words of the great Stephanie Tanner: "How Rude!"

Anyway, its no big secret that drivers on the East Coast are aggressive and perhaps ruder than others. I'm definitely NOT saying that midwest drivers are better, just different. I think I've figured out my new biggest pet peeve: a lack of taking responsibility.

Like the guy who wouldn't let me merge despite me having a signal on for over half a mile and my exit coming up. There was a two car size space I wanted to merge into, but the second I put on my signal in preparation to move, he sped up, closing the gap! So when there was enough of a space to squeeze my car in (my exit was REALLY coming up) I did it and he honked and flicked me off. Not my problem buddy. I tried to slow down to go behind you and I tried to go before you closed the gap. Your problem.

Or the girl who totally ignored the yield sign and got angry and (again) flicked me off because I "cut her off." No, you ignored a yield sign and were in my blind spot (hence the reason YOU have an yield sign? maybe?)

Those are just two examples. I am willing to take responsibility for my transgressions, like when I creep up to try and make a right turn and miss seeing a pedestrian trying to cross. Oops, sorry ped!


Just needed to vent my spleen!

weather

Some strange weather lately. First it was warm enough to ditch the coats and today is a sloppy, slushy mess.

BUT on my island it just rained. And rained and rained and rained. I was really confused last night when I went to visit my friend in Toms River because he said "maybe its better for you to drive up (to visit him rather than visa versa) because you're better in the snow." I just let it slide because I figured it had something to do with me being better at snowdriving = me being better at raindriving.

I should've worn my snow boots because the parking lot was SUCH a mess. It was like being back in MN!

Today I thought maybe the snow had melted everywhere because it was really warm on my island, but as I drove westward I saw more snow, like about 14 miles inland. It slowly got more and more, until at around 50 miles (Cherry Hill/Camden) it was pretty messy and slowed-down traffic (plus there was a state trooper driving in our little group of cars.)

But at 21 miles (just before the New Lisbon Developmental Center) I saw the most beautiful and unusual things. The trees lining the road ahead of me were green, lit nicely by the rising sun coming from behind us. It looked nice and fresh, clean and spring-like. But through my rearview mirror was the exact opposite look--the trees looked like they were coated with icicles, glittering and silvery-white.

I was so startled. I kept looking ahead and back. Ahead, spring. Behind, winter. Ahead, green. Behind, silver.

I wish I could've captured it somehow.

Poor fishies.

Temperatures right now are hovering in the teens, and the windchill has dipped to below zero. This, of course, is nothing compared to Minnesota, where they are struggling to get the mercury above zero, but it is darn cold nonetheless.

And, my heat went out. Again.

It went out last week but was fixed enough to keep me warm that week. I went to Philadelphia this past weekend for three days of eating myself silly (Restaurant Week, BYOB and going-away party) only to come back to a heatless house on Sunday afternoon.

It was 45 degrees in my home. And my fish died.

Poor little Aoi and Akai. They were my buddies. They watched TV when I was watching TV, wriggling their little bodies towards the set. And I let them freeze to death. I gave them a proper burial at sea, and proceeded to huddle down under some comforters until my gas could be repaired. Again. Unfortunately, it took 23 hours before the gas company could make it out, so I drove back to Philadelphia, in time to see the Bears lose.

It made me sort of sad because I realized there were not too many places around where I live that I could turn to in a time of need. I have two friends in the area who I feel comfortable enough with to ask to spend the night. And both were out of town. So back to Philly it was. Back in MN, I would've had dozens of places to go...I guess that's a big struggle, is how do you make friends when you are out of college? You don't want to walk up to someone in a bar and be "hey baby, wanna be my friend?"

I am lucky to have such good friends only an hour away, but I wish I had friends only minutes away. And I wish I had my fish back.

(picture is of Akaiii, who is the new fish I bought today. I am keeping him at work. The extra i'd are to remember that he is the second Akai.)

SNOW!

I had another post, about LBI history, all ready to publish, but something else happened to bump that post to another day:




IT SNOOOOOOOOOOOOWED! I am so excited! My co-workers think I am very strange because I like the snow so much. I guess I am strange...especially when it comes to snow. I just think snow is so fun because it means snowball fights, snowmen and lots of pretty white glazes on everything.

Unfortunately, the snow we got was just enough to put a thin layer on roofs, but not enough to cover all the dead, brown grass on the ground. It is also fairly warm, which is nice because the roads are not slippery since the snow just melted when it hit the pavement, but I wonder if it means the snow will not stick.

(note to self: work on run-on sentences)

The sad thing is I didn't realize it had snowed until I watched the morning news and they said "from city to shore, snow..." and I thought to myself "shore? I am shore! Does this mean it snowed?" The same thing happened the other day, when I was checking the tracking of a package via my computer and realized it was outside and I had walked right past it. Oops.

Tonight I am heading to the local library for a movie viewing and discussion. I wonder if it will be me and a bunch of old ladies, like the opera workshop I went to? Either way, its a chance to interact socially, which I need!

Weather

flooding, originally uploaded by seat_5a.

The weather here has been rather unusual. Its odd to have 70 degree weather and go to the beach to watch the sunset with no coat on on Saturday...and then have it snow today.

This, I believe, is not normal weather. I've been assured that it does, indeed, snow down here. I am ridiculously attached to the snow and wish it would...though I wonder how much of that is some sort of Minnesota bravado, where I need to prove to these soft people how tough we northwoods people are!

But I don't feel very tough at night sometimes. The wind howls when it rains and a bush in front of my house scrapes against a window and makes these "eeek....eeeeek....eeeek" noises. So, I haven't watched a scary movie since I moved out. Too much to stoke the imagination. I don't know if the rainstorms here are more furious or if I just scare more.

They have nor'easters, which are like the north Atlantic version of hurricanes. They can produce up to 90 mph winds and torrential downpour! The result of these storms can be coastal flooding...and living on an island, that means me!

The combination of a nor'easter and high tide and full moon caught me the first weekend I moved out here. The flooding wasn't too bad, but it was exciting for me! I had to move my car because this is salt water flooding, not freshwater flooding like in the midwest.

Blizzards I know how to deal with, but driving in the flood was hard--how do you drive through high water without splashing all over your car and risk erosion?

I probably looked like an idiot that day but that's okay. I know how to handle myself in ice and snow storms, pumping my brakes and all. Just wait until it snows, I'll show them!

Unfortunately the snow today did not stick.

local color

a really, really, really nice day
Yesterday we went for a drive. It was absolutely gorgeous, perfect weather outside yesterday--nearly 70 degrees. In January! So we left our coats at home. We went down Route 9 through Little Egg Harbor and Tuckerton and then we drove down Seven Bridges Road, which I wrote about for the APP as one of my first stories assigned to me.

It's a pretty little road-to-nowhere that ends abruptly. It was originally intended to serve as another route to LBI, but the seabed was too soft to build a bridge across. So it just winds through wild marshes, with only small marinas and abandoned fish factories along the way.

It has several "one-hoss" bridges that only fits the width of one car at a time. A stoplight helps regulate traffic, so two cars don't accidentally end up facing each other on a bridge, where the only way out is backing up. Scrubby pine trees, tall grass and brambly bushes grow alongside the road, which sometimes dips so low, it feels like you are driving on the marsh itself.

At the end of this road is an old red-and-white Coast Guard Station, now home to the Rutgers Marine Field Station. The bushes grow high at the turn-around. The road ends with a metal road barrier, but just beyond that barrier is a small path that goes through the curving bushes. The bushes are like a tunnel and, even if you've been there before, its sort of exciting to see what is on the other end.

Which is a small beach that opens out into the Atlantic Ocean. From there you can see the very tip of Long Beach Island, Atlantic City, other small uninhabited barrier islands and miles and miles of ocean. Seagulls dip and soar and scream and you almost think you can see them scooping up fish, but never manage to actually catch them in the act.

Out on this narrow beach, we spread my "dirty" blanket, huddled under my "clean" blanket and just sat there as the sun set. I thought we wouldn't be able to see it from that perspective because we would be facing east, but the sun set right in front of us, just west of Atlantic City. Luckily the sky was almost cloud-free. Unfortunately, the one place where there were clouds were exactly in front of the sunset, just above the horizon. Nevertheless, we enjoyed most of the sunset, rolling up our blankets a little early so we could enjoy the drive by dusk.

Post-birthday

Saturday afternoon Maya, Ravi, Tom and my co-worker Brian came to my house. I made butternut squash and apple soup, cranberry cream cheese wontons, spicy grilled cheeses and had apple cider for drinks and apple pie for dessert. I REALLY liked the cranberry cream cheese wontons. I could've sat and at those all afternoon, for serious.

Later, my landlords Anne and Brian joined the party. It was a nice group--again, good company and good conversation.

After everyone left, I quickly showered and changed into my indian outfit and headed north on the parkway to Dobbs Ferry, NY, for a Diwali party at my aunt's house. Anyways, they had a birthday cake for me! It was really nice and I felt a little emotional. I was touched...

I then had a horrendous drive home. Somewhere on the Turnpike someone hit some sort of animal that was all shredded on the road. The driver in the lane next to me sort of hit it again, thus throwing bits of dead animal carcass at my car. So now I am driving down the parkway, in my Indian clothes, at midnight, with bits of bloody meat, probably rife with diseases, stuck to my car. Some of it comes off with my windshield wiper fluid, but a bit just beyond my wipers stubbornly stays stuck. I kept putting more fluid onto my windshield, hoping to loosen it off with the water...and in the process MISSED the exit for the Garden State Parkway.

My mind is so full of dead animal meat, that it takes a REALLY long time before I realize I am not on the GSP...like when I reached a sign that said Freehold, but didn't say Asbury Park...then I started to think, uhhh this isn't right. I ended up having to go all the way down to 195, go across the state and then head south (I could've taken a highway across, but the freeway felt safer and faster.) So I didn't get home until 2am.

this morning I had to drive BACK up to Point Pleasant Beach to cover a heart walk. But it was cool because I've never seen the boardwalk up there before, and its apparently one of the best, according to many people I've talked to. Now I am at work, tired...but there is a nice flower arrangement to keep me company! Chao sent a cute fall-themed arrangement to my office. It even has a pumpkin in it. My mom sent a big bunch home, and it came in her signature blue vase, even. Both have alstromerias, which make me very happy.